2 Corinthians 12:9, "His grace is sufficient for me, His power is made perfect in my weakness."

It has been a difficult two weeks here and I can't tell you how blessed Aaron and I feel by the love and support of our family and friends. The outpouring of prayers have been incredible, so a big THANK YOU is my first order of business in today's blog. I can not tell you what it meant to receive your calls, either to offer help with the kids or to just listen and pray with me. We believe prayer is powerful and so a special thank you to my wonderful friend, Rachel, who "stormed the gates of Heaven" with her prayers. You are all such a blessing.

For those of you who may not know all that we have been dealing with these past two weeks, here is a quick update. On June 18th, I wrote a blog about Gracie and our concerns for her, specifically the large tongue and the possible underlying issues that could be behind it. To make a long story short, we are having Gracie tested for Beckwith-Wiedemann Syndrome. (For a brief description of this disorder, you can go to the following link http://www.bws-support.org.uk/html/what_is_bws.html). We had an abdominal ultrasound last Thursday and received a wonderful report. All of Gracie's organs are of normal size and there is currently no tumors present and no defect of the abdominal wall. We give God all the praise for that great report! Unfortunately, we are still not able to rule out BWS but we are thankful that we are not currently dealing with any tumors or organ involvement. Children with BWS must undergo cancer screenings every three months until age 8 because tumor development on the kidneys and liver is a heightened risk and continual screening allows it to be caught at an early stage. We are scheduled to see a Geneticist at Vanderbilt on August 1st to undergo more testing. It is our prayer that Gracie does not have BWS and that her macroglossia (large tongue) is just an independent issue and that her other mild BWS symptoms could be explained away by other things. No matter what happens, we are placing our complete faith in God and know that His grace will carry us through anything.

That brings me to our next issue! Many of you who have known me for a long time know that I was diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis in my childhood. This caused me occasional pain and joint inflammation in one or both of my knees. I have seen Rheumatologists for years and have been monitored closely for any other autoimmune disorders. (When you have one autoimmune disorder, you are at increased risk of developing another later in life.) About 4-5 weeks ago, I began having joint symptoms in my knee. I did what I typically have done for years whenever this happens, rest when I can, elevate knee, ice, heat, NSAID medication, etc. Despite all these efforts, my knee worsened. I was unable to walk on it and went in to see my GP. He drained the fluid from my knee and gave me a steroid shot in the joint. This is my absolute least favorite thing to do...ever! I handle epidurals during labor better than this procedure! It is so painful that Aaron even offered to take me anywhere I wanted to go afterwards for a "treat." The "treat" I chose was a nap! We were all assuming that I was just dealing with an arthritis flare associated with my JRA but a few days later, the blood work that was done at that appointment came back and was a bit troubling. We realized we were dealing with something new. I have been tested for Lupus many times over the years and the initial screening test for these types of autoimmune diseases was always negative in the past. However, this time it was positive. We were referred to a Rheumatologist at Vanderbilt and had an appointment this past Wednesday. Right now we are looking at the possibility of Lupus, Lymphoma, or something out of long list of autoimmune diseases. More blood was taken and a battery of tests are being run and I return to the Rheumatologist on July 22nd for a more definitive diagnosis.

These past two weeks have been a real test of faith for me. I have been reminded of a lot of things, like how easy it is to praise God in the good times. Praising him during the bad times can be harder but the reward is great and I am taken to a deeper level of faith. It is so exhilarating to watch God bless our lives each day through the good times. I have had many days like that. I have also walked through some mighty tough days over the past 3 1/2 years and during those times of darkness, I always reminded myself to look for the light. I knew it was there and I did not want to forget to praise its presence during that time. We are to praise God in ALL things. It is easy to say, not always easy to do. For me, it takes reminding! Another great lesson God is teaching me began when I was talking to Tiffany, a great friend God has blessed me with here in Nashville. She and her husband have been walking the extremely heartbreaking road of infertility and she said three words that ministered to me in a way I will never forget. I asked her if she ever had the "Why me?" moments, a thought I had been wrestling with this past week. She said, "Why not me?" God used that as a real teachable moment for me. We all go through times of suffering. As believers, we are not exempt. In fact, God uses suffering to perfect us in the likeness of Christ. God does not allow for suffering as punishment. I believe suffering is an essential part of life, so that we may see fully the measure of God's grace. Paul says in 2 Corinthians, "We share in His sufferings in order that we may also share in His glory." There are so many heart-wrenching situations that people are faced with every day. In Aaron's job he cares for the tiniest babies, many of them so ill that they may never make it home. The agony the parents must experience is heartbreaking to me. I praise God that I haven't been faced with the unbearable pain of losing a child. God has protected me in numerous ways and I am so thankful. I have prayed for peace and God has given that to me, along with a few life lessons! Well, I'll end this incredibly long blog (if you have read it all, you are a dear friend!) with some favorite scripture...Romans 5:1-5, "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."